Call Her Daddy
Call Her Daddy
"The biggest feeling that I feel it's just like there's like quietness about like my life and like more in control of my own life and it's just me and my thoughts in whatever I choose to be." — Lauren
"The fact that you were looking it was social media that was making you feel like you were missing out on a life and you were regretting being in one of the greatest cities I was like did I fuck up should I have not gone to New York City." — Alex Cooper
"The machines are controlling us I'm like oh my gosh and Instagram has taken control of my thumb and like literally like like you're sitting on the couch fully cognizant of the fact that you just deleted social media yes and then all of a sudden my thumb is going to where it used to be on my my phone." — Lauren
The episode begins with Alex Cooper introducing her childhood best friend, Lauren, who has recently deleted all her social media accounts. Lauren details her early experiences with social media, starting with MySpace in seventh grade, and how it immediately fostered feelings of comparison and insecurity. The conversation then moves through the evolution of platforms like Snapchat, where ephemeral messaging and friend rankings created a "shady" environment, and Facebook, which introduced the concept of curating one's online persona and documenting social lives, influencing behaviors like drinking and dating.
As the discussion progresses to college and post-college life, the impact of social media on Greek life, finding roommates, and navigating social circles in new cities like New York is explored. Lauren recounts the intense pressure and comparison within sororities, driven by curated Tumblr and Instagram profiles. The post-college period highlights the feeling of isolation and FOMO exacerbated by social media, particularly when friends are perceived to be "making it" in big cities. A significant turning point for Lauren was the "dopamine rush" of gaining a massive following after making her account public, which, while validating, also exposed her to cyberbullying, including cruel comments about her appearance and even her father's suicide.
The core of the episode focuses on Lauren's decision to delete her social media. She describes the overwhelming screen time, the realization that these platforms were not contributing positively to her life, and the struggle of "phantom social media finger" syndrome. Lauren shares how this digital detox has led to a profound sense of quietness, increased presence, and greater self-control, allowing her to engage more meaningfully with herself and her immediate surroundings. The conversation touches on the detrimental effects of comparison, the impact on body image, and the unique challenges of dating without a social media presence, concluding that the quietness and control gained are invaluable.