Call Her Daddy
Call Her Daddy
"Heartbreak does one other thing though. You're probably not just feeling all kinds of things, you're probably acting in a way that's really out of sorts. You're probably acting in a way that whether you're controlling the impulse or not, you have the impulse to text a person a hundred times an hour to reach out, to beg like you feel desperate. And that is what confuses a lot of people because it's one thing to feel like, oh, I'm heartbroken, but they're acting in ways like what is going on with me." — Dr. Guy Winch
"What our brain looks like when we're heartbroken is very, very similar to what our brain looks like when we're heroin addicts in withdrawal." — Dr. Guy Winch
"Recovering from heartbreak is not a journey it's a fight. You cannot be an autopilot. You have to be very mindful and intentional about what you do and how you think and who you talk to and how you're going about things because you are trying to heal this is an active process not a passive one so get the tools get on the program and shepherd yourself through this don't just wait for yourself to float through it." — Dr. Guy Winch
The episode delves into the complex experience of heartbreak with clinical psychologist Dr. Guy Winch. Dr. Winch explains that heartbreak is a form of grief, often compounded by societal dismissal of emotional pain. He draws a striking parallel between the brain's response to heartbreak and withdrawal from drug addiction, highlighting the intense desperation and impulse control challenges individuals face. This perspective helps listeners understand that their reactions are physiological and not a sign of personal failing.
Dr. Winch advocates for an active approach to healing, cautioning against passive wallowing and isolation. He stresses the importance of re-engaging with social support systems, even when it feels difficult, and suggests setting boundaries for conversations about the breakup. The discussion also addresses the common feeling of humiliation post-breakup, explaining how it stems from a blow to self-esteem and the tendency to review personal deficiencies rather than acknowledging common compatibility issues or emotional drifting.
Practical advice is offered on managing the aftermath of a breakup, including the necessity of establishing a "no-contact" rule, refraining from idealizing an ex, and creating balanced perspectives by listing relationship flaws. The concept of closure is redefined as an internal decision to stop seeking external validation from the ex and instead focus on personal rebuilding and forward momentum. The episode concludes with encouragement for listeners to be intentional and proactive in their healing process, treating recovery as an active fight rather than a passive journey.